(Note: This is just a translation of the Tagalog piece circulating in the Internet entitled "Pinoy si Noah…Sure 'Yon" and is nothing but a product of wild imagination- DAB)
In 2007, God appeared to Noah, a middle class Filipino citizen. God told Noah that a year-long rainfall will flood the entire country. He instructed Noah to build a boat and load it with Filipino couples from every region and islands including animal pairs of males and females from all over the country.

Then God gave Noah the specifications on how to build the boat. With all humility, Noah accepted the gigantic responsibility to save the nation from the plague. After a year, God appeared to Noah again. However, Noah told God that he was notable to build the board as instructed. "Why were you not able to build it?" God angrily confronted Noah.

"I am sorry my God for not building the boat. There were a lot of problems along the way," Noah explained. He then proceeded to narrate these problems. First, he applied for a mayor's permit but the mayor would only issue the permit if the construction firm of his relative would do it.

He then sought the help of the congressman in their district who likewise assured Noah of his help only if he gets a 30% commission from the project. At this juncture, the workers hired by Noah to build the boat formed a union and staged a strike. The left-leaning groups got wind of Noah's plan and launched a series of mass actions to protest the selection of boat passengers. They insisted that only believers should be allowed on board.

The third sex joined the mass action claiming that there is bias in requiring only the husband and wife. Even the civil society supported the movement upon learning that part of the money to be used in building the boat would come from donations of gambling lords and jueteng operators.

Due to the unrest, the Senate conducted an inquiry "in aid of legislation. Noah tried to invoke Executive Order 464 in order to avoid the Senate probe but considering that he is not an official from the executive branch, he was compelled to attend the Senate investigation and testify. Upon knowing that God was the one who ordered the building of the boat, the Senators claimed that it is unconstitutional because of the principle of the separation of church and state.

The Philippine National Police (PNP) and the National Bureau of Investigation (NBI) came into the pictured claiming that as per intelligence reports, the boat would be used by Erap Estrada in his great escape. But the Intelligence Service of the Armed Forces of the Philippines (ISAFP) and the Department of Justice (DOJ) said it would be utilized by the Magdalo group in their coup plot against the President.

Exasperated, Noah finally approached Mike Defensor in order to talk to the President who is reportedly favorable of the plan only if her face and the words "Towards a Strong Republic" would be marked in both sides of the boat.

Noah told God that he did not agree with the proposal that is why there is a temporary restraining order (TRO) issued by the court against the project. Noah said he needs at least ten more years in order to finish the boat. After pondering for a while, God told Noah: "It would no longer need for a year-long rainfall to flood and destroy this country. I will just allow your people to do the destruction themselves.

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